Plot I've been thinking about. If you can decipher my plot notes, I'd like some feedback...

Convelutedness ensues. This outline is kind of confusing; the beginning is just contextual/character stuff, and then there are subplots. Try to imagine the subplots all going on at the same time.

Overarching topic: identity

Sci-fi setting. There is a 'democracy,' but elections are rigged and politicians are bribed. As the media is being controlled by only two basic corporations that have daughter companies in every market, nobody knows or cares about the political situation. While the media feigns opposing POVs, they're really in each other's pockets. There are rumours of a rebellion, but among average citizens it is regarded as a myth/joke/conspiracy theory.

Woman is an average citizen, about 45 yo. She has friends who work in media, and she paints and makes pottery/ceramics for a living. She has a very strong relationship with her brother.

A man, early 20s, strong, stoic, unstable. We learn he has a girlfriend who he sees as perfect, innocent, and sincere. He has a journal that used to belong to his father, with which he's obsessed.

A man, mid 50s, is lecturing at a university. A girl enters, very coy and giggly, fox-like. They decide to go to a live exhibit, which is a very popular form of entertainment/art - live models made into art.

A young girl is a model at the live exhibit. She came from a nomadic group of exiles, but was captured at a young age and forced into the exhibit. She's very happy with where she is, and her role as a piece of art defines her.

So now that you have context, here's what happens:

- Woman has an accident. Forgets everyone, even her brother; he is working for the government. 20s Man was involved in her accident, and her brother is being pressured by his work to probe her for information, because they're looking for him. [Is she a different person now that she has no memory? Do his choices define him?]

- 20s Man is going into a downward spiral, becoming more obsessed with the journal and finding out who his father is. He hits his girlfriend, and is becoming crazed and paranoid. He is lured into working for the rebels against the government. The current goal of the rebels is to 'save' the live models. He finds Old Man, who has alzheimer's. Old Man used to know his father, and his father wrote about him in the journal. 20s is behind the rebellion. However, Brother finds him, and offers information about his father if he will rat out the rebels. He does. After he finds his father, he is taken by the rebels. He is interrogated by his girlfriend, who is also the Girl from the university we saw earlier - she has been spying on him for the rebel cause. Her and 50s man are at the top of the rebellion. She says she knows who his mother is, and names the woman with amnesia. 50s man, who turns out to be 20s' father, kills him.

- Girl from the live exhibit is being further brainwashed. Brother goes to see her very often - he has a video of the journal from 20s apartment, and has figured out that she is the daughter of Old Man. She is kidnapped by the rebels, who want to set the live models free. But when she is set free, she doesn't know what to do. Like sheep, all of them return.

- Brother catches 50s man and forces him to divulge information about the rebellion, Old Man and 20s man. He tells the live exhibit girl, who wants nothing to do with him or Old Man. Old Man admires Girl's beauty and then promptly forgets why he is there. Brother returns home to his sister.

OH MY GOD SERENA, if you can pull this off that would be amazing... but I thought you don't do outlines?

The convoluted-ness of your plot is breath-taking, and I think that, despite it's twisty nature, is straight forward enough for everyone to appreciate it.

I also love your setting, it sounds so dystopic, yet disturbingly believable (maybe because we could be heading towards that kind of a civilization?).

I was wondering if your charaters were going to have names?

Thank you!!! I'm glad you actually understood what was going on. XD I usually don't, otherwise I get bored... But I think this sort of outline - like, rough outlines of subplots - will work for me.

Thanks. I always appreciate plots that seem random and unconnected, and then link later on. I'm doing media studies, and right now we're analyzing the big ten corporations. That's mostly what inspired me, because I totally agree with you that this may be where we're headed. I want it to be dystopic and yet make it real enough to make people uncomfortable. I'm so glad you got that!

Yes, they will lol. I'm just not sure what they'll be yet... And I don't know what kind of names they'll be, either. I'll have to think about that.

P.S. Love the new layout!

Serena, this sounds freaking awesome.
You could totally not embellish it more, just keep it in this rough sketch-esque form, and carry on and it would be possibly and probably a) tres cool, and b) hillarious beyond words; what with the big ideas going on and twisty plots and then the contrasting simplicity and bare-bones-ness of how its presented. Just a thought

in conclusion: LOVE IT

Serena,

That's intense! In an awesome way, of course. We'd love it if you could write it and share it with the club! So, is this going to be a novel or a short story? Will this story be third person omniscient or first person? I must say, the plot and the twists and turns are going to keep the readers guessing and guessing. It's really neat that your media class inspired you - it goes to say that we as writers must always keep our eyes and ears sharp. You should definitely go for it, and like Angela asked, are you going to give your character names, or keep it mysterious?

- Zerin

1) Thanks so much! I'm really excited to write it - I think it'll test my pacing skills.

2) I would love to share it! I THINK it'll be a novel... But knowing me, it is fully possible that I won't have the patience. Probably going to end up being a short novel. It's going to be in the third person - I want it to be a little distanced, but still personal enough that we can get into their thoughts. I really like what you said about writers always being alert! It's so true. Beauty's made that way.

I do have names! Ahem:

Average citizen woman: Lenore
20s man: Raiden
Old man: Ira
Girlfriend/Rebellion girl/Spy girl, whatever you want to call her: Ariane
Father/Rebellion leader: Dalton
Live model girl: Zilpah
Brother: Amos

This would be way too complicated without names. XD

Heh, this is pretty interesting.

I would love to see this written up. Although, I'm a bit confused with the outline...

However, I do see it has potiental. I find outlines somewhat confusing but once I see some of the story, I'll begin to understand what going on. XD

BTW Serena, I LOVE THE NAMES!! Makes me want to use them for my story. Just joking, but if I wasn't could I?

Actually scratch that.

I think I know what's going on. XD

Hi, Megan. ^^ Thanks for the appreciation! Thanks that you took the time to R&R, but I don't think I'm comfortable with you using my names. If they were just any old names I might be comfortable with it, but names are a big deal for me. I spend hours looking up the names that sound perfect, and their meanings and origins also have to fit. Especially in this novel, where one of the principal topics is identity and the names serve as clues for the fact that Lenore, Dalton and Raiden, as well as Ira and Zilpah, are related, the names are an integral part. Thanks for the compliment, though.