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 Obsolete - Chapter 1

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Dark S3cret
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PostSubject: Obsolete - Chapter 1   Wed Feb 25, 2009 12:12 am

Future.


“… We all know that in this perfect society, there is no crime. And that in this perfect society, everything is monitored. Criminals have no where to run, no where to hide. We get them before they can even begin. Years ago, it didn’t matter how hard law enforcement worked, they would always be too late. Now they’re early. This is an improvement like all the others, huge, impressive, and universally beneficial.

We all know that no one dies anymore. This poses a problem to the fragile equilibrium of our world. As limitless as our resources are, space certainly isn’t. Everyone wants to believe we all live forever, but because we so severely disrupted the natural and dynamic equilibrium of our world, we must take responsibility to control it. To have life, you must have death. And from this simple, logical observation that one cannot exist without it’s opposite, we draw the sacred equation that the High Equilibrium abides by. The influx of life must equal to that of the departed. And the departed are only the ones who are deemed unworthy to have a place here, in this perfect society that has taken us multiple millennia to create.

Because, the reality is that with our knowledge, we have risen way above than just to top of the food chain – we have risen high up, up into the sky. There’s nothing stopping us, and someone has to make sure the world runs smoothly and properly with the system in place.

The Obsolete is without a doubt, an arguably shady branch. We are hushed up by the government, and no one knows we exist. No one wants to know that we exist.

But without our hand in dealing death, chaos would reign, as it has for thousands of years before. We are the keepers of order, peace and perfection. We are the right hand of the highest power. We are the ultimate. We are… the Obsolete.”

She rose, along with the two hundred selected others, clapping more enthusiastically than she had ever done before. At the podium, the elegant Lady Fate nodded her head in the regal way of hers, before she stepped down and vanished, melding into the dark shadows of the backdrop.

The grand hallway, although dimly lit, still radiated a powerful, albeit dark glamour as the applause echoed through, bouncing off the walls. She continued to clap, marveling the way this new power and confidence flooded through her veins along with the eager anticipation that made her normally reserved demeanor vanish, replaced by an almost childish impatience.

She let her hands finally drop to her sides, and closed her mouth tightly shut, realizing how fascinated and enraptured she had to have been for it to have fallen open. Glancing around surreptitiously, she slipped through the row of chairs silently, easily, only to bump into someone on the stairs.

“Watch where you’re going!” came the angry voice, along with a string of unprintable profanities as the other girl teetered precariously on the edge, threatening to cause a commotion if she did end up falling way down below.

Smoothly, and silently, she stepped forward, and her hand shot out to grab the wind milling arms. Within a split second, the other girl had regained her balance and they both stood, standoffishly, a few cautious feet apart as the people behind swerved to avoid them.

The other girl frowned imperceptibly, as she contemplated this unusual gesture. She was going to right herself eventually, so why did she help? Sure, it was her fault… but generally, it was well known that people still and often had trouble adjusting to their physically enhanced bodies, often overshooting in their new, near super-human abilities. But they never got hurt. Or in the unlikely event that they did, the new, accelerated healing would immediately kick in.

Despite it being a perfect society, the entire speculation about technology affecting human socialization turned out to be very true. Casual communication had diminished to the point of vanishing completely. And that was only one of the myriad things to have faded along with the imperfect past.

No one ever needed help anymore.

“Um. Thanks,” she said awkwardly in low tones, once she came to the conclusion that she could not fathom the other girl’s intentions. She slowly gathered her composure, watching the girl watching her, and eyed her savior with a thinly veiled stare of distrust.

She smiled. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you too,” she finally replied, somewhat disarmed by the friendliness, especially after she had lashed out so rudely.

“I guess I’ll see you around.”

She felt a surge of mixed curiosity and yearning. Her voice was unique. Not exactly low, or deep, but unnaturally calm, an air of melancholy and dry realism hidden beneath the quiet words. She watched her lift up a hand, and was fascinated by her odd wave. Her delicate, slim fingers were a blur as they curled into her palm before she too, melded into the shadows, much like the Lady Fate.

It wasn’t until her mind finally registered the absence of her presence, did she realize she forgot to ask for a name.
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Delrez

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PostSubject: Re: Obsolete - Chapter 1   Wed Feb 25, 2009 6:15 pm

Very nice, very well written.

One thing, you might want to look for some synonyms for equilibrium. You're kind of repeating it a lot.

But very nice.
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Dark S3cret
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PostSubject: Re: Obsolete - Chapter 1   Wed Feb 25, 2009 9:03 pm

Okay. Thanks. =DD
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root vegetable

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PostSubject: Re: Obsolete - Chapter 1   Thu Feb 26, 2009 12:02 am

HOSHIT
HOLLYFUCKINGSHIT
first of all: i love you.
we must elope.
second of all: READ THE UGLIES SERIES, OMFG THE SECOND AND THIRD BOOKS I SWEAR ARE SO SIMILAR SOMEWHAT TO THIS..... reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeem...................
third of all: i like it. and: who are the girls???? what do they look like? whats the narrarators name, among other questions Razz
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