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 Spicy to Stark

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Dark S3cret
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PostSubject: Spicy to Stark   Thu Apr 08, 2010 6:32 pm

There were sounds in my head. Little voices whispering. “She’s a danger you’re addicted to.” I like the way you smell. I like how it lingers in the fabric of my clothing. Even when you’re gone. I don’t know what your intentions are, and I don’t really care. You leaned in, I could feel your every breath on my cheek. Your skin on my skin. It still burns, beneath your smile and the sun. It’s too bad you’re not perfect. I think I could fall in love with you. But it wouldn’t go anywhere. Night walking. Shivering in the cold. Cake and vodka and whiskey. Conversations. I feel protected. Like myself but better. Conquests. Mindset of a winner. She’s jealous. It’s human. I can listen to you talk. Someone with vision and passion and a direction. Like me. I want to be friends forever. We could rule the world together. My art. Your camera. Our two hundred unassuming pounds. Your psychology. My mind games. I’m an enigma only you can read. A puzzle only you can solve. Lock and key. Balls and liquid. Music and music and summer nights. Stargazing, romantic dead things. Quiet afternoons soaking up the sun. Clouds whimsical and insubstantial like my thoughts. When you gave me the last piece, when you sat there watching me fight. Playing peek-a-boo when I was afraid. Taking me to learn lies. Tea bubbles and bonding. I am dark and twisted. You are noble and light. You move so fast, so beautifully. I love dancing with you in the ring, hearing you laugh, seeing your smile. Your patience and worldly experience. Our observations. Giving, taking. I’m nice, you’re mean, but you can’t give yourself to me. Don’t you belong to someone else? Friend is a nice ship without a dreary end awaiting. It’s all I want from you. The only thing I need. Door to door, satisfaction. Pushing the world away or keeping it on your shoulders. Determination. Perspiration. Dedication. Legacy. A glimpse into your life. Brief opportunity, since you won’t be staying. Please come back. Here with me. Saturday nights out. Roaming the city. Searching for strife. We are champions of justice. Build a peaceful world. It’s a habit. You’ll always be a go to me. I don’t know what I am to you. It’s hard to understand your jokes. Lemons, water and waitresses. I think I just died a little inside. Le Petit Mort strikes again. You are heartbroken, I am a heartbreaker. Night, you say. You don’t know that I save your every word. Every word. They fall from your lips. I catch them, preserve them. Memories slip through my sieve. They slip. Fade. Are forgotten. I read, I interpret. I think I’m wrong but I’m always right, even when I don’t want to be. Going with a bang in Obama’s hood, isn’t that what you said? Family is all you have in the end, and some friends, but they are so few and far in between. It’s dark tonight. They blink at me. We’re lying on the roof. Pens and paper and parts of soul bared. Crossed like lovers, distanced like enemies. I moved on. Grew up. Met you. And realized I didn’t go anywhere. I’ll never admit it, but I can’t lie. There’s no one to lie to. I know who I am without you. It’s when I’m with you I forget. You’re everything I dreamed of, ever, but compacted. But everyone has their shortcomings. You’re the only one I can follow, the only one who can dominate. I’m going to miss you when you leave. But you’ll be back. There’s too much you’ll be leaving behind. Too much you need to remember. It’s Spicy and Stark. Contrast. Dichotomous. Fitted and presentable. Love and affection. Sofa beds and afterglow. More to come? Hopefully Definitely. Has to be. One, two. Me, you. Affliction. Totally. Together. Now. Synched and psychic. Fin…?
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The Blue Box

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PostSubject: Re: Spicy to Stark   Thu Apr 08, 2010 6:54 pm

Heya Smile

You are distracting me from chem, which I am going to return to imminently, BUT I just read this and had to comment.
It's nice Smile It feels intimate. I have conjectures as to what it's about Razz but I won't share them here. I like it a lot, anyway - all the sentences without verbs.
This is not a long comment. I just wanted to get first impressions up there. And also I have to study. BUT I may comment more in future.

And I might try to write that piece you asked me to tonight. We'll see Wink

[Uhm. This feels like a totally useless post, but I kind of wanted to let you know that I'd read it? Razz]
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Dark S3cret
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PostSubject: Re: Spicy to Stark   Thu Apr 08, 2010 7:29 pm

Yay. For comments. Very Happy
ALSO. HEY. I know what you must be thinking. So I feel like I should explain. Whilst it sounds like me having feelings for someone, it really isn't.

Admittedly, it began as a confessional type train of thought, because I just wanted to record all the very enjoyable moments we've had as friends together, it later evolved into a piece that would go into "30 nights of", which is a project where the someone and I are working on together (complementary picture/diaries). To date anyway, we're sort of roleplaying as these characters. He is Cloud and I am Rachel. And Cloud and Rachel are together.

The entire premise of the "30 nights of" is that it is a fictional account of our real experiences.

If that made any sense at all. :]

And thank you, you don't have to commeNt with critique every time. I like it whenever and whatever you post.


Last edited by Dark S3cret on Mon Apr 12, 2010 4:31 pm; edited 1 time in total
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The Blue Box

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PostSubject: Re: Spicy to Stark   Thu Apr 08, 2010 8:30 pm

Okay, your explanation is fair and does make sense. I just thought. It seemed the logical conclusion, you know Smile

& thanks for letting me off the hook re. critiquing Wink
And I still like the piece a lot. It's really expressive.
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Owle Gray

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PostSubject: Re: Spicy to Stark   Sun Apr 11, 2010 2:14 am

Hey!

I love it. Very escapist. And calm. Nice rhythm. Made me less miserable. Thanks for that.

I don't think there should be anything to correct, 'cause that would just ruin the confessional style.... So, great job, and wow! that was good. It's nice to read something of yours that doesn't have that sexual tension to it. Quite possibly, this is my favourite of all your works.

Oh, and it's great that one doesn't "have to commet with critique every time." Because i don't have that many comets. Razz
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Dark S3cret
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PostSubject: Re: Spicy to Stark   Mon Apr 12, 2010 4:31 pm

Oooh. I love that word. Escapism. Very Happy
Your welcome! I'm glad you're a little les miserable.

LOL, no sexual tension? Well, I don't think all of my works have sexual tension... >.> Maybe you should read more of my stuff? XD

Shh. Typo. >.>
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PostSubject: Re: Spicy to Stark   Mon Apr 12, 2010 4:31 pm

Also, thanks for commenting. Very Happy
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PostSubject: Re: Spicy to Stark   Mon Apr 12, 2010 4:31 pm

Or should one say "Commeting" ? Razz
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